Totally confused but always optimistic

Desi Punctuality

I always strongly believed that no matter what others think or say, Desi people have the capability to be on time to public or family events. But after last weekend’s wedding of my sister, I firmly believe that no matter what, Desi people can never be on time.

I will walk you through the three days of my past weekend when all of this happened

Mehndi: OK, let me start with the first event we had for the wedding; Mehndi. Mehndi was held on Friday May 18, 2007. The guests were invited at 7pm and we were going to start the dinner at around 8:30pm. So at around 7pm, there was ONE person at the event location. I have no doubt that the only reason she was on time was because she lived not too far from there. Nonetheless, she was on time.

All of a sudden it was 7:30pm and then 8pm and may be one or two more guests arrived. At this point we were supposed to be well into the event, singing and dancing. At around 8:15pm, it was Maghrib prayers time, and it made sense to start the proceedings after the prayers. It was around 8:45 when we had decent amount of guests that the girls started the dance and singing. Once it all started, it was soo much fun and excitement.

This all happened when we all requested to the guests that PLEEEASE be on time and that we will be starting the event on time. Of course most of them said they will be and NONE were even close to being on time.

Baraat: Next Day, it was the Baraat. Baraat is the BIG day during a Pakistani wedding, when the Bride’s family invites their guests and the Groom’s family and friends come during the event and then the family pictures, portraits, dinner and other stuff takes place.

Take a look at the series of events below:

So our original schedule per the invitation card:

Guest Arrival: 7pm

Arrival of Baraat: 7:30pm

Appetizers: 8pm

Dinner: 9pm

Actual Turnout:

Guests at 7pm: 1 person + a some of the close relatives

Around 7:30p: We had to call the barat (groom’s family and guests) and ask them to hold on until further notice

Around 8:30pm: Decent amount of guests starting to arrive

Around 9pm: The arrival of Barat

Close to 10pm: Appetizers and Dinner

As if all of this mess was not enough. The Limousine guy shows up at around 10:15pm saying he has to pick up the bride and groom, and he strictly has to leave by 11:15pm.

Now imagine the climax of a Pakistani wedding. Is it possible for it to happen in about an hour?

IMPOSSIBLE!

Not just that, he wanted cash up front just for waiting to be there. So the groom’s friend paid him up front and we tried to rush through our events i.e.,food, portraits, family pictures with each family, giving mubarak baad to the newly wed, wrapping up etc.

Anyways, by the time we got done for the nigh it was 1am. Of course the Limousine guy was long gone taking along with him the money that he did not fully deserve, and we had to use a relatives Mercedes to transport the couple to the hotel.

Did any of the guests know that the effects their punctuality had on our plans? No.

Will it matter if they do? Most probably not.

Walima: Next day, it was Walima. Walima, is the day when the guests are usually from the groom’s side. Just like the previous 2 days, the guests were told of 7pm. How many guests were there at 7:45? ZERO

Walima day was not that hectic for me at least, since I did not have to run around much, so I guess i didn’t feel the ‘punctuality effects’.

But still…..I have realized, 7pm means 8:30p on desi watches.

Next time, if I plan any desi events, I will give the guests a 2 hour early start, so they can show up at the right time. But if one of the guests really do show up on time, and the host is not there to welcome them??

We had originally planned to be strictly on time for our events, for the day of Baraat. But we had to give up our plans.

Long live the DESI punctuality.

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